I've decided to go for the AXBB-E from CNCDrives, looks as though it will do what I want, and for the drives I think I'll go for the Stepperonline ones recommended by Kitwn, they appear to be the correct spec and are a reasonable price. I'll be buying the UCCNC software to run the controller, CNCDrives have an offer of the AXBB plus UCCNC for £178, saves a few quid.

That leaves the issue of controlling the spindle. I have two options, the simple one would be to use an external controller such as this one
https://gimsonrobotics.co.uk/categor...th-lcd-display

or go far a PWM controller that it should be possible to control using the AXBB and UCCNC, this one appears to fit the specs
https://www.4qd.co.uk/product/sst/

I'll be using either Cut2D desktop, Fusion 360, or VCarve desktop to produce the GCode and toolpath, possibly Rhino as my daughter is a jewellery designer and is fully familiar with Rhino (I'll cheat and get her to do the designs...)

Anyone got any comments on this lot before I press the buy buttons next week? Thanks for the hlep so far!