Well at least I didn't know the bloke but she did, she worked with him for six years! but the affair "only" started last August. It's not so much the affair but her attitude since I found out. She is trying to prevent me seeing the kids at every opportunity she can even though I was their sole carer for the first 2 months. Being a total be itch like I was the one who did wrong won't talk to me, Text only or "speak to your solicitor" She's gonna be in for a shock though because I offered her £40000 for a clean break and her solicitor said she'd get a lot more (without knowing any financial details) so she refused but it seems she may be entitled to less than that now and because she went straight to a solicitor she will end up with even less. Here's hoping.